24 Aug

so, today was probably the most stressful day in my colombian life thus far, seeing as I only have 3 days left, let´s hope I max out here. It´s only the second time I´ve cried while I´ve been here (haha the count is probably up to 10 now because I cried on a few occasions today), the first time this summer was when I got really sick 3 days after I got here, and the events that caused today´s crying are as follows:

I was supposed to have an appointment with the DAS to get my visa stuff fixed at 7:30 this morning, but aiesecers called me last night to say we had to change the appointment because they forgot to get a form they needed from the bank (only for me, they got it for jason), and I was going to have an appointment in the afternoon. However, I woke up to a phone call from Jason at 9:00 that started out, “Now Molly, I have some bad news, I got the papers I need to leave, but they wouldn´t give you an appointment until August 31st, so you can try going down there but you probably are going to have to change your plane ticket and leave after August 31st.” (when discussing this later this evening Jason said: “yeah I kept talking because I was waiting for you to like get upset.” Then my brother chimed in, “yeah, there was quite a bit of crying that went on immediately after she hung up the phone.”) Which is very true: the next hour I spent calling people trying to figure out what I could do, while intermittently breaking down and saying: “What am I going to do, I have to start school, I have to move into my apartment, I can´t afford to change my plane ticket??!!” I´m glad Ben was there to moderate and to remind me: breathe, composure, exhale.

Quite a few Colombians were like: “well can´t you just like start school a little later?” mm no, it doesn´t work quite like that.

Keep in mind: today was the last day I could have an appointment because it takes a day to process, they´re closed on the weekend, I leave early monday.
So finally we had most of my papers together and we were walking to the DAS to meet Andrea, who had the rest of my papers, when she called me and said the DAS is closed. She did not tell me quickly enough that they were only closing for 3 hours for lunch, and I had already began jumping up and down on the sidewalk saying no no no, and eventually collapsing into the grass to cry a little more. It was quite the dramatized breakdown, and I hope that some Colombians saw it just to add to their preexisting notion that Gringos are in fact crazy.

Anyways, we went at 2, where one woman told us we needed an appointment, another one told us to wait in line, and one finally said: “You never needed an appointment, you just need the paperwork, come in now.” This same woman told the next guy (who came for the same thing as I did) that he wouldn´t be able to get an appointment until sometime in September. For a government agency, this place was astoundingly arbitrary, as they were all just making up rules as they went along. I had to meet with this mean woman who Jason accurately described as “under qualified for her job;” her job was taking finger prints and typing a little bit on the computer. She made me sign about 16 forms and asked Andrea about 7 times if this was my first time to Colombia. The she entered my name into some computer documents, where she would randomly decide each time whether she wanted to put 1, 2, or 3 spaces between each word as she slapped the space bar with her thumb. Then she finger printed every single one of my fingers on both hands: TWICE. The second time was on the back of some sheet, I don´t think it was legit, I think she just wanted more opportunities to slam my fingers into the ink and then slam them onto the page.

Anyways, since I “didn´t know how to speak spanish,” and this woman clearly didn´t know how to speak english, seeing as she had no idea she was wearing a shirt that on one half in english said: “feminine club, TOTALLY feminine, royally feminine” and on the other side, diagonally: “INDIAN RAGS INDIAN RAGS INDIAN RAGS” (what does that even mean?) Andrea and I were able to make comments like: “She is really stupid, her hair is really ugly, she is kind of a jerk.”

What a drama filled day. Everything is fine now, I just have to go pick up the papers tomorrow. Looking back this is kind of funny, I kind of sound like a drama queen, but man I was already feeling pressed for time before school, and that just pushed me over the edge.

anyways: people should leave more comments, because comments validate my blogging existence.


10 Responses to “OMG”

  1. Frank D August 24, 2007 at 7:47 pm #

    I’ve been following your blogg since you moved to Colombia, let me just say that you are the funniest blogger i have ever read and that I’m very jealous of you. I went to Colombia 3 years ago and can’t stop thinking about going back!!!!!(i hope to move there one day you know) keep it up and happy travels!!

  2. Carybeth August 25, 2007 at 5:10 am #

    oh my gosh, when emily told me this story after i got home from volleyball, i almost started crying. i am so glad that you are coming home though, i honestly can not wait any more days than i already have had to. and keep blogging because you are hilarious and i love hearing of your adventures, although this one is not quite hilarious, more scary.i love you! 🙂

  3. Anonymous August 25, 2007 at 5:24 am #

    Hey Molly, I am really glad you are going to make it back for your Colombia party, it wouldn’t be as much fun without you. I really am glad you are coming back Mon. cause I miss you, Dad

  4. Benjamin August 25, 2007 at 8:36 am #

    i miss you, but not enough to pick you up from the airport.oh wait, i don´t miss you because you´re sitting right next to me, and i´m probably going to pick you up from the airport and stuff you onto the metra. maybe someone who really does miss you will pick you up in kenosha.

  5. SarahEliz August 25, 2007 at 11:52 am #

    Ojala q’ todo sea bien con la maldita DAS ahora. Me alegre mucho q’ pasaste bien en la costa. Yo te aviso cuando este en los EEUU despues de IC porque quiero hablar contigo nena. Enjoy your last few days in Colombia and do not worry about your blog, because I am pretty damn sure than you have about a billion readers who you are making laugh on a regular basis!! te mando muchos besos desde Turquia. un abrazo enorme:)

  6. Peter August 25, 2007 at 3:47 pm #

    I love blog.See you in a few short days, and happy travels!

  7. Anonymous August 25, 2007 at 6:31 pm #

    We have enjoyed your blogging so much. we’ve laughed & laughed at all of them (except the last one) But I will enjoy having you in Wis.more. See you soon. Love Gma.

  8. Kristen T. August 26, 2007 at 4:13 am #

    Molly you are so cute. I can’t wait to see you again. P.S. I wish I were as cool as you.

  9. Katy August 26, 2007 at 7:38 am #

    ooomolly you make me laugh. safe flight back chica and you best have one sweeeet GV table for miss maren and that fabulous events team 😉

  10. kristen August 26, 2007 at 7:53 pm #

    molly! i’m glad you’re coming home. tom asked if you could bring him some indian rags. it sounds like you’re getting all kinds of ideas for new t-shirts to make once you’re back! i love you!

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